Monday, June 26, 2017

Undelivered promises

It smelled good, it looked good and the feel was almost right. Not exactly like the skin on the back of gramma's arm, but close enough. The first nectarine of the season was dry, tasteless. I ate it, I'll eat nearly anything. And I know it's early, the season will bring new ones.

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Not exactly a back flip off a cliff into the Sea of Cortez in Mexico

Nor was it a 90 mile an hour helmetless Harley ride, nonetheless it was a feat of daring-do. I had caviar in Oslo. My sister had ordered it, offered me a bite and against my better judgement I took a huge risk and tasted it. And it was lovely. So my last night in Oslo I actually ordered it. To eat. For myself. I don't recall what the hell I ordered for my main course, although you can see it below, some slow-roasted thing. The Royal Indian Mounted Police had some sort of fish that he boned expertly. To rub my face in the fact that while I was taking a risk eating something that might possibly be fishy, it wasn't much of one.

Monday, June 19, 2017

Happy stuff

(and believe me, there is plenty of unhappy stuff) My spice drawers are really important to me (surprise). As if I didn't have enough jars, I inherited this spice jar system from the Royal Indian Mounted Food Control Police when he vacated this shining country for more dreary climes (talkin' weather not politics). When I built my new house I was/am clueless and it was impossible to anticipate my needs. So there is much doesn't fit anywhere, and there are dead ends and useless closets. Wasted corner space and oddly located outlets, to name a few issues.

But this is not one of them. This entire set of spice jars fit in one kitchen drawer perfectly. It couldn't fit one more jar.

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

The vodka got in the way

I don't even drink the shit. I have it for people who do and I keep it in the freezer. Somehow the cap kept the freezer drawer open just a hair...then this happened. Granted it was like that for a week. But still. I nearly had a heart attack when I opened the freezer drawer.

I was like, "oh sure...a new refrigerator and now this..." Just one of the various surprises and miseries that await me when I move in. Count on it.

Friday, June 9, 2017

Relocation and belt holes

Moving is hell on my waistline. You'd think after a month of pain and a 15 pounds weight loss (OK, it was 3 months of pain) I'd be more circumspect about what the hell I eat. But when you're moving, A. It's stressful, B. You have no kitchen, C. You get SUPER hungry at inopportune times and locations, like across the street from McDonalds at 2 pm and, D. Food can magically come to your house via delivery.

I seem to have locked onto a pizza delivery system that works well for me. I had it for dinner on a number of occasions in amongst the boxes and chaos. And then for breakfast I had the cold pizza sandwich option. It was delicious. The next time, though, I gave the leftovers to a neighbor kid who is doing odd jobs for me. I have some self control, upon occasion.

On the right you see what the future holds for me unless I get my kitchen set up.

Friday, June 2, 2017

Forgive me Father

For I was moving and I had no time, nor any kitchen, nor victuals in my abode. For this sin and all the sins of my past life (well most of them anyway) I am truly sorry.

Monday, May 22, 2017

Sorry, I'm on leave

I'm moving this week into my new domicile the building of which has been a shitstorm. But it is done (ish) and I am packing. Not fun. It's been little by little but the movers, hopefully muscle-y smoking-hot guys although it will more than likely be overweight, smoking, gum chewing unshaven fat guys with back braces, and they'll need it, my boxes of book are heavy, are coming on Wednesday.

So long and short is I am not cooking since I have nothing to cook with and I am eating dull stuff the but real reason is that I am too busy to write.